Migraine

Hoi. Sorry dat ik al 6 maanden niet geblogd heb. Ik weet niet zo goed waarom ik geen nuttig woord meer op papier krijg. Het gaat gewoon niet. Maar dat komt wel weer, ooit. Ik leef in ieder geval nog, dan weet je dat even. Dat zit dan in elk geval nog mee. De rest helaas niet zo. Maar dat komt op zijn tijd ook wel weer. Hoop ik.

Nu laat ik jullie graag even achter met dit nummer, wat een best wel accurate representatie is van wat er ongeveer plaatsvindt in mijn hoofd.

Am I the only one I know
Waging my wars behind my face and above my throat
Shadows will scream that I’m alone

I’ve got a migraine
and my pain will range from up down and sideways
thank God it’s Friday
‘Cause Fridays will always be better than Sundays
‘Cause Sundays are my suicide days
I don’t know why they always seem so dismal
Thunderstorms, clouds, snow, and a slight drizzle
Whether it’s the weather or the letters by my bed
sometimes death seems better than the migraine in my head

Let it be said what the headache represents
It’s me defending in suspense
It’s me suspended in a defenseless
test being tested by a ruthless examiner
that’s represented best by my depressing thoughts
I do not have writer’s block
my writer just hates the clock
it will not let me sleep, I guess I’ll sleep when I’m dead
and sometimes death seems better than the migraine in my head

Am I the only one I know
Waging my wars behind my face and above my throat
Shadows will scream that I’m alone
But I know we’ve made it this far, kid
yeah, yeah, yeah

I am not as fine as I seem pardon
Me for yelling I’m telling you green gardens
are not what’s growing in my psyche
it’s a different me
a difficult beast feasting on burnt down trees
freeze frame
please let me paint a mental picture portrait
something you won’t forget, it’s all about my forehead
and how it is a door that holds back contents
that make Pandora’s box’s contents look non-violent

Behind my eyelids are islands of violence
my mind’s shipwrecked, this is the only land my mind could find
I did not know it was such a violent island
Full of tidal waves, suicidal crazed lions
They’re trying to eat me, blood running down their chin
and I know that I can fight or I can let the lion win
I begin to assemble what weapons I can find
‘Cause sometimes to stay alive you got to kill your mind

Am I the only one I know
Waging my wars behind my face and above my throat
Shadows will scream that I’m alone
But I know we’ve made it this far, kid
yeah, yeah, yeah

And I will say that we should take a day to break away
from all the pain our brain has made
the game is not played alone
And I will say that we should take a moment and hold it
and keep it frozen and know that life has a hopeful undertone
[Repeat]

Am I the only one I know
Waging my wars behind my face and above my throat
Shadows will scream that I’m alone
But I know we’ve made it this far, kid
We’ve made it this far, we’ve made it this